notnadia / inothernews / ipsadixit / inothernews / synecdoche: what if i make t-shirts for my nonexistent band OBSCENE GERUND AWESOME. DON’T FORGET THE CONSTANT INTERRUPTIONS OF CONVERSATIONS AND SAYING OTHER PEOPLE’S NAMES REPETITIVELY. DONNA: Josh.JOSH: Yeah?DONNA: I want your band t-shirt.JOSH (annoyed): What? No.DONNA: It would look better on me.JOSH: No.DONNA: It would. You know it.JOSH: Sam!DONNA: I like band shirts. I still have my The Who from when they played Wembley.JOSH (mockingly): “My The Who”?DONNA: Definite article.JOSH: “My Who t-shirt” is fine.DONNA: It’s not.JOSH: Donna —DONNA: It’s really not, Josh. The “the” is important.JOSH (pleading): Sam!DONNA: If the noun calls for a “the,” you should say “the.” Like, “THE Philippines.” “Made in THE U.S.A.” “THE West Wing.”JOSH (gets up, starts walking out office):  Funny. But you can’t have my shirt. DONNA (pouting): Please?JOSH: I wear a small.DONNA: So do I.JOSH (exasperated): An extra small.DONNA: Well that’s why I like you. I like my men… petite.JOSH (irked): I greatly dislike you right now. SAM!!!SAM (out of nowhere): He really is petite.DONNA: I know! It’s cute. Makes it easier to cuddle with him.SAM: Ew.DONNA: Him being petite and all.JOSH: Now you definitely can’t have my shirt. And you — (TURNS TO SAM) — eat my shorts.SAM (to DONNA): Petite and kinky.DONNA: That’s hot.(JOSH leaves, frustrated.) CJ (interrupts): Josh, is Donna half naked in your office right now?JOSH: No.SAM: Yes.CJ: ”Donna is but isn’t half-naked in Josh’s office right now?”JOSH: Yes. I don’t know. What was the question?CJ: JOSHUA-JOSH: It got lost! In the… thing. Sam knows.SAM: Yes.CJ: The thing?SAM: Absolutely.CJ: It got lost.JOSH: Yes.CJ: In the thing.SAM: That’s as much as I know so far.CJ: You’re just repeating words right now.JOSH: No chance of that.CJ: You’re repeating words. A hundred thousand immigrants are dying in this foreign country we invented because we can’t actually say the real one but it is totally analogous to our current socio-economical situation, and you are talking about A BAND T-SHIRT?SAM: Possibly. Absolutely.CJ: I work with morons.JOSH: You don’t actually, we drafted the language for the-CJ: ARE YOU STILL TALKING. I would absolutely watch this episode.

notnadia / inothernews / ipsadixit / inothernews / synecdoche:

what if i make t-shirts for my nonexistent band

OBSCENE GERUND AWESOME.

DON’T FORGET THE CONSTANT INTERRUPTIONS OF CONVERSATIONS AND SAYING OTHER PEOPLE’S NAMES REPETITIVELY.

DONNA: Josh.
JOSH: Yeah?
DONNA: I want your band t-shirt.
JOSH (annoyed): What? No.
DONNA: It would look better on me.
JOSH: No.
DONNA: It would. You know it.
JOSH: Sam!
DONNA: I like band shirts. I still have my The Who from when they played Wembley.
JOSH (mockingly): “My The Who”?
DONNA: Definite article.
JOSH: “My Who t-shirt” is fine.
DONNA: It’s not.
JOSH: Donna —
DONNA: It’s really not, Josh. The “the” is important.
JOSH (pleading): Sam!
DONNA: If the noun calls for a “the,” you should say “the.” Like, “THE Philippines.” “Made in THE U.S.A.” “THE West Wing.”
JOSH (gets up, starts walking out office):  Funny. But you can’t have my shirt.
DONNA (pouting): Please?
JOSH: I wear a small.
DONNA: So do I.
JOSH (exasperated): An extra small.
DONNA: Well that’s why I like you. I like my men… petite.
JOSH (irked): I greatly dislike you right now. SAM!!!
SAM (out of nowhere): He really is petite.
DONNA: I know! It’s cute. Makes it easier to cuddle with him.
SAM: Ew.
DONNA: Him being petite and all.
JOSH: Now you definitely can’t have my shirt. And you — (TURNS TO SAM) — eat my shorts.
SAM (to DONNA): Petite and kinky.
DONNA: That’s hot.
(JOSH leaves, frustrated.)

CJ (interrupts): Josh, is Donna half naked in your office right now?
JOSH: No.
SAM: Yes.
CJ: ”Donna is but isn’t half-naked in Josh’s office right now?”
JOSH: Yes. I don’t know. What was the question?
CJ: JOSHUA-
JOSH: It got lost! In the… thing. Sam knows.
SAM: Yes.
CJ: The thing?
SAM: Absolutely.
CJ: It got lost.
JOSH: Yes.
CJ: In the thing.
SAM: That’s as much as I know so far.
CJ: You’re just repeating words right now.
JOSH: No chance of that.
CJ: You’re repeating words. A hundred thousand immigrants are dying in this foreign country we invented because we can’t actually say the real one but it is totally analogous to our current socio-economical situation, and you are talking about A BAND T-SHIRT?
SAM: Possibly. Absolutely.
CJ: I work with morons.
JOSH: You don’t actually, we drafted the language for the-
CJ: ARE YOU STILL TALKING.

I would absolutely watch this episode.